My Wife Journal #24

You Are God Alone

08/12/2026 @ 7:08p.m.

Song: You Are God Alone Artist: Marvin Sapp



    As the Lord has been preparing me for the releasing of this next teaching, I have also remained true to my own feelings. I say this, because when you give your life to Christ you just don't know in what hour, or how you will be used. And through this walk, I have seen so many things happen after the fact of having my own feelings about why I didn't want to do what the Lord was moving me to do, that I just sit back in awe, after all that I was feeling the situation ends up working out in the favor of my path. 

    For instance, when I had to go to eviction court not once but twice within two months, I was not trying to even do that. Like I was trying to really plead with the Lord, like why do I have this much peace about going to the courthouse, not knowing that the Lord had a ram in the bush each time. And it just amazed me how the Lord will look out for His obedient servants when we just trust Him, because let me tell you, I WAS ON EGG SHELLS!!!! LOL!!! I was like, what in the world this don't even make sense. Lord, why would you have me do this, knowing I don't have a penny to my name, no boxes packed, no movers in place and no destination. And then boom!!! Not once but twice, I walked in that court room and heard the words DISMISSED!!! 

    This just goes to say, that God is so good, and we most times are so wrapped around our feelings that, we forget who God is!! He knew that I would hear the words Dismissed!!! He knew that would build my faith, like through the roof. And when I say, that has built a standard of faith in me, that I am like beyond thankful for just, serving a good God now; I just didn't know it could get this good.

    And most of us, try to do things in our own strength. But if we would just allow Him to be God, then He will show us how, and what to do in any moment. Let me say this... When we face trials like this, this is the Lord refining us, so that we are dependent on Him. We HAVE TO GO THROUGH LONG SUFFERING SO THAT WE ARE NOT MOVED BY OUR FLESH! He needs us to know what it looks like to walk this walk through the lens of the spirit. See when you walk in the spirit, then we have a sense of what it means to not walk by sight. That is what the scripture means, to walk by faith and not by sight. The adversary will always try to make things look terrible in the flesh, that is why we have to remain steadfast on the Lord during those hard moments of adversity, so that we can overcome. 

    The enemy's job is to get you to give up, curse God, turn from the walk, and say if you are God then why are you allowing this to happen. You can change this right now and allow these things to stop. Why if you are God and you see me hurting, then why can't you see the struggle and change my life. That is why we have the story of Job, so that we can have an example of how, if we stay present with Christ, He will then come through for us, all the while making us stronger in Him. But what good is it for us, if we get what we want based on how we feel because it's not comfortable to the flesh? That is what the Lord needs us to lose is wanting to be comfortable in the flesh, because then we will know what it means to walk in the spirit and not go off of what we see in the natural. We are just spiritual beings wrapped in a fleshly body that is constantly warring against our spirit to want to feel good every second of the day. So, when we, walk in the flesh and complain and say things, like why would God want us to go through these things. It's not the Lord making us go through these things. Alot of this comes from our own choices because of the free will that we have. And other times it comes from needing to grow in Him on another level, and other times things that stems from our forefathers that someone has not walked in the spirit in order to break the things off of what carries over from generation to generation.     

    What we have to understand, is that if everyone practiced walking by faith and not by sight and walked with Christ, then the adversary would not be able to cause havoc in one's life. But many of us don't see it that way. Many of us don't understand that Christ follows a strict program, of law. And when we don't follow his ordinances in what he teaches on how to defeat the tactics of the darkness, then we can subject ourselves to the law of you reap what you sow. And although there are things that happen to the innocent, this again stems from things not being broken before the innocent came into the world. So somewhere along the way, certain things needed to be broken spiritually, in order to avoid the enemy trying to destroy let's say a child's life before they even had a chance to speak. This is in turn is the parent's fault because as a parent, we have to stay in battle over our children to break the attacks. But if we aren't doing those things then it can affect our children until we decide to deal with it in the spirit. 

    I just remember, when I wanted to be done with what I was going through. I even remember the times where I questioned God like why can't you just do this so that I can feel better about what was going on. And it pained me to know the Lord was allowing certain things to happen to me, that it bought took me all the way out. Sometimes I would get so mad at the Lord, to where I would throw things in my closet and just kick and scream in my pillow. LIKE WHY LORD??!!!  But I needed that, to be dead to the flesh. To crucify the flesh. What I've learned is that the voice of the Lord is more profound when you walk in the spirit. You're not easily upset, when things don't go your way or how you feel it should go when you die to the flesh and then walk in the spirit. And that is the place that Christ needs for us to be in. 

    In the beginning before sin existed, Adam was steadfast on who Christ was. Adam had not a worry, concern or anything going on around him because he focused solely on who Christ is. And when sin entered those things changed to where he noticed what was going on and came into the knowledge of things going on around him at that time. And so, all these years the good news has been preached to help us to understand that if we stay steadfast on who Christ is, then we can also be in that place of not being moved on things that don't feel comforterable when we have our eyes fixed on who God is. He is God alone!!! Nothing about God, is out of order. Trust me I know just by what I've been through that, God is real. He will tell you when things are wrong, He will show you what to do in the hour of trouble. He will, tell you the hearts of man, He will direct your path, He will heal you, He will love you in ways you have never been loved, He will show you greater than what you have ever experienced. And although I can't feel Him physically, I know he is always around me. He is my safe place, my peace, my Lord and savior, He is just all that and more. He is God Alone!!! Oh how I love the Lord. He has delivered me, from fornication, perverseness, going to different kinds of clubs, cussing, smoking, trying to control things, being vengeful when I was hurt, and healed me, and set me free in my mind and heart. He is just that!!! A true living God. And oh, how I wish everyone could experience this type of love because once you taste of it all the way, trust and believe you will not want to go back. LOL!!! But it can be painful when trying to reach Him. Because before we are completely allowed into his space, He has to clean us up, and if he stops that process, then how will we learn, how will we grow, how will know how to appreciate being in His space if we don't know what it means to be crushed, refined, and processed. 

    So, by the time we are processed, then we are ready to walk in our Purpose and that is when we start to see the fruit of the Harvest and by that time, we look back and really appreciate the trying moments. I know I do.. And of course it didn't feel good while enduring but I will say is that, that time was well spent, because of the growth that I look back on, as to how I have evolved. At one point, I use to care what someone thought about me. Ask me if I care now!!! And DON'T!!! All that matters is what my Father says about me, and He knows me by name, and that is the place we need to get to. And again I would prefer to not share anything, but as I am also sharing the good news through my testimony, I am also speaking to the hurt, wounded, and those that hate from a distance, that there is joy in the Lord, all the while speaking to the one that will soon hold my heart. To help others understand, that you to can experience this type of satisfaction. It's a beautiful feeling. And in all of that I pray that you understand that God is God all alone and there is none like Him. In the meantime, may the Lord continue to build you up and keep you in His safe space, as we near the threshold of placing the Lord as the focal point of our union. 

Signed, 

Your Wife