My Wife Journal # 27

The Queen needs a King

08/28/2026 @ 5:58p.m.

Song: My Heart Sings Artist: William McDowell


    I want to share with you why you will mean so much to me when we meet, because I don't know if you will ever understand the magnitude of what I endured to even get to this point. I was really in the pit like Joseph, and went through the trials like Job, but I came out like Queen Esther. My faith and the Love I have for the Lord is what kept me enduring. The healing that I needed was more than I ever thought I needed. The long suffering helped me to realize truly who I am in Christ in order f or you to see me spiritually. Yeah, I've been approached by men throughout this journey. Matter of fact, more so that I've been on this journey in person then when in the world in the physical. There was a time where I didn't get any action whatsoever, but here and there, I would get a look or two and an introduction, and it was a mixture of saved and not quite saved men that approached me. But I knew in my spirit, nah, you not him. 

    See, what I need you to understand is that I believe I know who you are already, however, I know there are a few more things that is needed in order for this introduction. And I want to explain this real quick. My actions have been intentional since I gave my life to Christ more so along the lines of getting me right and ultimately becoming a wife for you. But I knew that from the things I endured and had to overcome that I would not be dealing with any kind of man, and that he would need to know the level of the mantle that I carry, because it is a heavy one. And I do mean heavy. I mean who do you know, in this hour that is a woman that is able to break down the next 10 years as it's geared toward the Great Tribulation? Don't worry I'll wait. These people don't want our voices to be heard. Why do you think all of a sudden these pastors are fallen from bringing the word or not teaching on what really needs to be taught, it's because of the hour we are in? They're scared of what man can do to their lively hood. 

    Well, I am here to tell you, I already know what it feels like. I tell you what, I can guarantee you I can help these A-listers because you know if they go against the grain, then their lives will be plastered on mainstream media. But needless to say, this battle is intense and so I know that you will have to be a man of great authority in prayer to cover me and you in this time we are in. I know that you will know your word and be baptized with the Holy Spirit and can hear from the Lord and receive direction from Him before making any irrational decision. I know that your leadership will be of high demand because your voice will be needed to lead those who are not quite there yet. I know that your heart posture will adhere to Christ and at the drop of any moment, if the Holy Spirit moves in the atmosphere you will drop to your knees in deep prayer and lamenting because of how sensitive you are to the Holy Spirit. I know that you love Christ more than anything in this world and that you are rich in spirit before you ever rely on money to accomplish what you need in life. I believe your faith will be just as strong as my faith to endure and lead the sheep as we embark on the times we are in. I believe you will be strong in heart, spirit, and maybe even physically! lol just thought I'd throw that in there. I believe that you learned from the hard knocks to get your life right and it came with long suffering as well. 

    And so, with that, I can't just accept anyone in my space. You know most men that walk in the flesh may see a nice-looking woman and not realize what she is up against and what she has dealt with and not know the starting point of what is needed in the hour of turmoil in the spirit. It says in the word, we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities and etc. To summarize, men that walk in the flesh fight with the physical artillery as to where a spiritually guided man, knows just what is needed in order to defeat the adversary and that is through prayer. So how can a man in the world cover a woman that has seen a lot, dealt with a lot of heart wrenching spiritual battles? HE CAN'T! And that's like me falling into my own pit, why because you look good and got a couple coins? I think NOT!!! No, I need a man that reads his word and is spiritually filled. I'm not saying you know how to break down the stories in the Bible or you know scripture. No! I need you to be in the meat of the word, where you stand convicted, and you study the word as it feeds your spirit and helps you to keep the flesh dead as you crucify it daily. I need you to know, that I waited for you, I put the dating life aside more so because I was scared to step out there again, but then it changed to being intentional, to now I am ready!!! I'm ready to embrace the heart of a man that will speak to me, through the spirit and not to my flesh. I'm ready to read and pray together and know that you are in the same heart space as me. Kendrick spirits is what it's called. I don't want any familiar spirits at all; the world can have it all. 

    And so, in this waiting period for the last 5 years, I have slipped up twice, one with the father of my kids in 2022 and another with the same man that scared me from ever wanting to date again months apart. And yes, I was extremely convicted after this. And let me just say this, again this is my blog, and if I didn't want this to be out there, I would have kept it lock and key. And trust me, I have a past just like any of us. But, from there I have stayed locked in with Christ not allowing any one to take what is Christ and next yours. I could have almost had another slip up along the way, but I did stay strong because I truly had to realize my weakness and become strong in that area. And by doing this, I learned my values and my boundaries. And that is don't put myself in any position to compromise or be around a man that is not in the same walk as me, let alone, I only need one man any way. 

    The only concern is that I don't go anywhere to really be seen. I know why that is, but I will not share that on this platform. It has a lot to do with my walk, and I'm sure you will understand when that time comes. But as for now, I'll end with this, my heart sings in this hour for you. I am just in a different heart space, to where I am putting it all out there, because this will be a masterpiece straight from the Lord!!! I know it, because if you endured anything like what I've endured then the kingdom of darkness is not ready for this ministry. One can send 1,000 aflight, but two can send 10,000 aflight. Get ready King, and I'll see you at the top!!!


Signed, 

Your Wife